hi mr. degraff,
i know this is out of the blue and anything far from formal. i figured i’d ask you because you seem very at peace and well in tune with your own emotional regulation and whatnot. i know we didn’t talk much either, and we aren’t really the closest, but i think i have anxiety. i constantly overthink things to the point of them impeding on my sleep, daily pleasures, and even relationships. do you have any words of wisdom to help me? please? again, i’m aware it’s a bit of an “out-of-the-blue” email, but i again figured you would know best. one day i’d like to say i’d lived my life to the fullest and still am, so im asking someone that i think has done that.
Dear, Michael,
It ain't easy, but the best thing I can say is to learn to shut off your thoughts. When you can't sleep, slow your breath down and try to count 10 breaths without sustaining a thought (other than counting). You will fail. Try again. Keep trying. Be competitive with yourself about it. Eventually you will get to the place where you can shut down your thoughts. But the thoughts are wily. The ego is tricky. It doesn't want to shut down. So you are in a competition with your own ego. Who will win?
Let's say you are up all night, just doing that. That's a great night of meditation practice!
Then just keep riding those breaths until you are aligned with being itself. No stress. And remember the acrostics? they are proof that our subconscious mind is wiser than we are. So just be at peace and let the larger Life intentions guide you.
A little worry can help guide you, but a lot of worry is the thing that you most need to worry about.
There is also exercise, which can be a huge relief from anxiety. Swimming is good. I dance!
I do live life fairly fully, but I have a LOOOONG way to go, to fully inhabiting my senses and potential. Managing anxiety is a challenge for all of us.
Master 10 breaths without thought. That's your simple, but nearly impossible, task.
